Modern dads know how to bathe, to feed, to care for the baby no worse than mom. Today the world father’s Day, which is celebrated by the world community and Ukraine, including the third Sunday of every June. The results of numerous medical studies have shown that fathers are able to pick up the signals of the child as sensitively as their mother. So the kids are equally attached to both mothers and fathers.
Unfortunately, in some families there is still an outdated view that the role of the father in the family is reduced to the conception of the child and financial support of the family. And, by limiting or completely forbidding the fathers to raise their children, their mothers depriving kids not only paternal love and affection, but also opportunities to grow up psychologically healthy and strong. Let’s see what say about this research and suggest psychologists.
A father shapes a child’s identity, his “I”
American psychologist grace Craig, author of one of the best and best-known textbooks on developmental psychology, in 2002 noted that the close emotional ties of the child with the father installed infants toddlers. A huge impact on the health and proper psychological development of the baby having a game with my dad. In the process of communication with fathers, the kids formed a sexual identity own “I”, and that paternal education shared by the dyad of mother and child, giving the kid an alternative object of love.
It is very important that the father supported the mother, even during pregnancy, not only after the baby is born. As the father helps the family system to function fully. It is the father to a greater extent than the mother teaches the child to sex roles: girls in fellowship with the father formed the development of the feminine, the boys – masculinity.
What role the father plays in the life of girls
The mother of the child is responsible for his emotional attachment, and dad for emotional independence. Frequent family conflicts or in the absence of one of the parents (not necessarily single-parent families, one parent may not engage in the upbringing of children) the child obtains the desired experience and assistance. If a child grows up without a father or father, step-father does not show much interest in the education of her daughter, the girl has a plant that the father does not need.
To do more harm to their daughters can mothers who consciously do not allow fathers in the education of daughters, considering it’s not a male thing (say, that you grow up – then you will what to say) or after a divorce. Thus the daughter develops their own idea of family: the girl in the mind formed an image rejected of men, which she then focuses in relations with the male sex in the future.
Only the Pope to explain and show his daughter that men’s world is not hostile, that man and woman are different but equal and vzaimouvazhenija. And no one else – no brother, no uncle, no, grandpa will not be able to handle this duty.
What role the father plays in the lives of boys
Children raised without fathers (especially boys) have smaller claims, they have a more level of anxiety and neurotic symptoms are more common. Boys, education of parents were not engaged, harder to build contacts with other children, falling grades in school, the worse they manage to male gender roles and behaviors. So these boys are aggressive and rude. The mistake many fathers who are waiting when their sons grow up, to finally deal with them “guy stuff”. Psychologists say: if the father was not engaged in the son and raised him to 5 years, the boy becomes more dependent on peers and less confident.
The passive father who is forced out of the education of his son, the mother or grandmother helps to create a situation in which masculine traits his son can hardly develop. The boys adopt the male model of behavior from their fathers: if the father is aggressive, then the son will do well, if the Pope is silent – the son also will consider such behavior the norm. Conversely, attentive, courageous, but open and good father – the best example for my son. Do not attempt in early childhood to “build” a son’s stiff attempts upbringing of a real man. Play often with the boy, having only her little secrets, games and the likes, dad will do better in raising a child than reading him lectures, or even deferring communication for later.